The devilishly sexy Fox series Lucifer edges closer to the end of season one with an episode titled #TeamLucifer airing on April 18, 2016. In episode 11 Lucifer (Tom Ellis) finally figured out that Detective Chloe Decker (Lauren German) is the only mortal who can actually physically hurt him. In this episode, Lucifer does his best to stay away from Chloe just in case she decides to turn on him. Episode 12 also finds Lucifer once again having to defend his reputation, this time with a bunch of posers trying to sully his ‘good’ name.
The Recap:
#TeamLucifer kicks off with a woman blindfolded. Is Lucifer ready to play? No, the “virgin” clad in white is also bound at the wrists and surrounded by people cloaked in black, hooded robes. With a cry of “Lucifer,” the leader plunges a knife into the virgin’s heart. Aww, but it’s all a game as she’s not truly dead and instead seems to be taking the ritual as foreplay. Unfortunately, her partner hasn’t let her in on the secret that he’s going to actually offer her up to the real Lucifer (which we know isn’t the real Lucifer). She breaks loose but not in time to stop the knife coming at her chest.
At the real Lucifer’s gorgeous home, Maze (Lesley-Ann Brandt) is throwing knives at her boss but they’re not having any effect. Iron doesn’t cut him so he tells Maze to try the copper, but she’s getting frustrated because she knows he realizes at this point it’s only Chloe who can do any damage. Maze offers to throw knives at Chloe, but Lucifer thinks maybe Chloe’s just a “clog in a bigger machine” and wants to keep testing for vulnerabilities. Maze, increasingly pissed off, throws a demon dagger forged in Hell at Lucifer which he catches before it can cut into his handsome face (those actually would hurt Lucifer, no matter who throws them). He inquires about what’s happening with his brother and Maze says he’s not the one weaponizing Chloe. Lucifer’s done playing around and is ready to send Amenadiel back to Heaven. As he’s leaving the room he stubs his toe and it bleeds, so apparently Italian marble can also injure the ruler of Hell. But, of course, that’s when Chloe walks in so it wasn’t the Italian marble’s fault after all.
Chloe’s mad Lucifer’s been avoiding her and he blows it off, saying, “I can’t play good cop/handsome devil cop all the time.” She’s there about a new case she can’t handle without him.
The good cop/devil cop team head to Hollywood and once there he won’t walk anywhere near her on the sidewalk. Lucifer uses the lame excuse that she sounds sick, but Chloe’s not buying it. They enter an empty theater and the murdered woman in white from the earlier ritual is laid out on the stage inside a pentagram. The officers roll her over and carved into her back are the words “Hail Lucifer.” Now it’s Lucifer’s turn to get upset that misguided cult nobs with “frisbees in their earlobes” would dare to blame this on him. A street preacher who had called Lucifer the devil outside the theater charges in and renews the claim that it’s all Lucifer’s fault, with Lucifer’s former would-be assassin, officer Malcolm (Kevin Rankin), escorting the preacher away from the crime scene. Malcolm gives Lucifer a wink after sending the intruder away, pretending to Chloe they’ve never met. After she leaves, Malcolm says their history didn’t need to be disclosed.
Dan (Kevin Alejandro) arrives at the crime scene and asks Chloe if they can talk sometime, but she gives him the cold shoulder. She’s definitely not putting the ‘break-up by text’ incident behind her anytime soon. Dan volunteers that he and Malcolm will check out who could have done the body modifications on the victim, Rose, after noticing she has some strange implants. Chloe agrees since she and Lucifer have to pay a visit to the victim’s father. Lucifer asks for the address, not wanting to be in the same car with the only human who can kill him.
At Rose’s dad’s house, Lucifer says he can relate to growing up with a single father like Rose did. He asks why she had implants and her dad knows nothing about it. Chloe notices scrapes on the floor and moves a bookshelf to expose a secret room. Lucifer yells, “Hello, bad guys!” and Chloe pushes him out the way. Dubbing it a creepy, evil secret room, Lucifer jokingly says he’ll decline the offering of a cut-up bloody chicken that’s on a nearby altar because of salmonella. Rose’s dad seems to have no idea this room even existed while Lucifer looks around and determines the killer was a large man who wasn’t a fan of bathing. Rose’s dad still can’t believe his daughter would be into this and he doesn’t believe she would ever sacrifice herself, which gives Lucifer the opening to announce that sometimes the people closest to you can turn on you. Meanwhile, dad’s blaming himself while Lucifer continues to throw sideways glances at Chloe as if he doesn’t want to leave his back exposed.
Back at the station, Dan’s figured out where Rose got the implants. She was with a weird guy but the girl who did the implants doesn’t remember his name until Chloe, on the phone with Dan, asks him to ask if it was Corazon. Yeah, that’s it, and the girl describes him. Chloe labels the description a “generic Satanist.” Rose brought in the subdurals to be implanted and no one knows what they mean. After hanging up, Malcolm jokes about how cute it is Dan’s trying to get back together with Chloe and Dan says it would have been easier had Malcolm not sent her a break-up text while he was knocked out.
In the underground parking lot at the police station, Amenadiel (DB Woodside) slams Malcolm against the wall and demands to know why Lucifer’s still alive and kicking. Malcolm tells him Lucifer told him Amenadiel can’t kill a human and plus he has his get out of jail free card anyway. “So, unless you’ve got a better offer, #TeamLucifer,” says Malcolm.
At the station Lucifer’s reading through the Satanists’ book and declares it not half bad even though it’s poorly written. He picks out a passage he likes and then thumbs further to find a whole chapter on sex, which of course piques his interest. Chloe meanwhile is trying to arrange Rose’s subdural implants into a word that makes sense. She comes up with “I hurl feces” but dismisses that, and all this is going on with Lucifer no closer than 10 feet away. She asks him to come closer which he does, reluctantly. Looking over her shoulder he immediately figures out what the implants spell. It’s a Latin word meaning children of the goat. If Lucifer was in a bad mood about Rose’s death in his name, he’s even more upset that Satanists keep using a goat as a symbol for Satan. “Why do they always associate me with goats? I mean, I don’t even like their cheese!” asks Lucifer, exasperated.
Chloe searches the internet for children of the goat and comes up with Church of the Dark Prince, but you have to be a member to get more info. And, of course, there’s a fee ($200!) as well as a lengthy questionnaire. Chloe takes a chance and signs in the member area using the word the implants spelled out as the password. It works and she finds out where the next meeting will be held. Lucifer notes the address and takes off, telling Chloe he’ll see her there.
Lucifer beats Chloe to the building where the meeting will be held and when she arrives she’s clearly over this whole separate cars thing Lucifer’s now into. She asks why he’s avoiding her and he says maybe she’s just not as charming as she thinks she is. [Wasn’t he supposed to be keeping on her good side after discovering she can kill him?] Before he can make it inside the building, Chloe has it figured out. She asks if it’s about that vulnerability thing and he admits it is. “I get the tiniest bit touchy-feely with you and you freak out,” says Chloe, now the exasperated one in this relationship. She only meant she could trust him and Lucifer seems to accept that.
Chloe bangs on the door and whispers Filii Hircus to the doorman, but that’s not good enough to gain entry as today’s event is a private affair. Chloe pushes Lucifer forward, asking if it’s too private for even Lucifer himself. The man guarding the door thought Lucifer was supposed to be blond and Lucifer concedes he gets that a lot. Lucifer sends Chloe back to the car to get his ID and when she turns away he flashes his red eyes at the doorman who freaks out and runs away leaving the door open for Lucifer and Chloe.
Lucifer regrets forgetting his sexy mask once inside, and then they figure out they’re witnessing a memorial. They sort of feel bad until the knives come out and the leader begins the ceremony. Once again Lucifer takes exception with these Satanists when they call out more than one devil – there’s only one Lucifer, after all. After a goofy fake Lucifer in a goat costume with horns hits his head on the wall entering the room, the real Lucifer can’t stand it any longer and walks into the room. “I’m the real Lucifer and I insist that you stop this nonsense immediately. I mean, have you heard yourselves? It’s embarrassing,” says Lucifer. He calls them misguided sheep – and goat – and asks where is the real defiance. They applaud him and he tells them they’re doing it again. They are not rebelling; they’re being sheep. They start chanting Lucifer and he smashes an alien/demon baby thing in a glass jar on the floor. He wants to know who murdered the girl. No one speaks up, but one man (the high priest) leaves the room and Chloe follows him out.
After putting down the ceremonial knife, Lucifer gets him to reveal what it is he really wants which is he wants to kill the person who killed Rose – not quite the answer Lucifer or Chloe were expecting. And after he’s done that, he wants out of this Satanist business. Now Lucifer’s a little disappointed this guy doesn’t actually believe in the devil. The high priest says all hardcore members have the implants and he didn’t want Rose to get them but she became obsessed. He also reveals it was Corazon, her boyfriend, who brought her into the group in the first place. Corazon talked about doing actual sacrifices on animals and the real knife, not the fake one they normally use in the rituals, is missing. Lucifer looks at a painting of ‘Satan’ on the wall and is disgusted while Chloe jokes that it looks just like him. “I manscape,” says Lucifer, clearly not appreciating the group’s taste in art. Chloe believes she knows why he chose the Lucifer persona: it’s all-powerful and invincible. “Not exactly,” says Lucifer. He says he didn’t choose to be the devil and she makes a comment about the devil being immortal. And then something clicks when he tells her one angel can hurt another. He grabs her back (where her wing scars would be if she had them) and she looks at him like he’s completely lost his mind.
The high priest returns with Corazon’s application for the group but it doesn’t have anything useful other than that he used PayPal to pay the dues.
Back to the angel/demon relationship, Maze brings Amenadiel some take-out after he stood her up. He says he only had one task which was to get his brother back to Hell and he’s failed. And, he’s actually made things worse because now he’s sleeping with a demon. Maze reminds him it’s the only sex he’s ever had while she’s had a lot with men and women, but with him it’s different. They kiss and Maze breaks away to tell him if he’s not happy, he should go home. Amenadiel says he can’t because he can’t face his father as a failure. And, they get back to kissing.
Back at her place, Chloe learns Corazon’s real name and tells Lucifer he can go home. He won’t leave which has her completely confused because earlier he couldn’t stand to be near her. Warning him not to wake up Trixie, he does just that when Chloe heads to the shower. He starts peppering her with questions including whether she’s adopted or if her mom has special powers, markings, scars, etc. She doesn’t answer so he bribes her by promising chocolate cake. Trixie, ever the smart girl, demands cash instead. He hands over money and Trixie tells him her mom has a scar on her butt from being bit by the Kraken. Chloe arrives back in the room just then and reveals the Kraken in question is a Chihuahua. She sends Trixie back to bed and tells Lucifer she’s done with his freaky behavior. He asks her to remove her shirt so he can see her back. When she asks why he tells the truth. “Because I want to know if you’re an angel sent to destroy me.” Incredibly, she complies and her skin is completely smooth. She wonders if it’s about his scars and tells him not everyone is out to get him. Chloe then gets a text saying they found Corazon’s car.
Dan and Malcolm are there when Lucifer and Chloe arrive, and Lucifer greets them with a “Detective Douche, Detective Stache, what a pleasant surprise.” They find Corazon strung up from the rafters, blood still dripping with writing in red paint all over the warehouse. The paint on multiple crates spells out Morningstar and now Dan thinks Lucifer’s somehow involved because not everyone associates Morningstar with the devil. Dan tells Lucifer people might be getting killed because of his devil shtick. “Do you really think I would do these vile things? These kids were pretending to be bad but they weren’t – they were innocent,” says Lucifer. “I would never hurt them. I am not a monster.” Chloe separates them before it comes to blows, suggesting Lucifer should go home. She’s trying to protect him but he takes it the wrong way.
He wakes up his therapist Dr. Linda Martin (Rachael Harris) for a session at her office, completely flabbergasted that Chloe did this to him and that she would actually believe he could have done something as disturbing as killing those people. “I thought she knew me,” he says, obviously upset at this turn of events. He tells Dr. Linda that Chloe is the only one who makes him vulnerable, and, of course, the therapist turns it into a relationship issue. Lucifer just wants to know who’s really behind the killings, wondering if it’s his dad or his brother. He also wonders if Chloe’s part of the plan to kill him. Lucifer doesn’t want to be at anyone else’s mercy and the doctor suggests he stay away from Chloe. Lucifer realizes he doesn’t want to.
Amenadiel and Maze are in bed and she pulls out the demon blade, thinking he’s asleep. He’s not and he catches her, appearing devastated she wanted to kill him.
On the street, the preacher who recognized Lucifer as the devil confronts him again. Lucifer’s patience for his nonsense quickly wears thin, and he’s in no mood for mercy. As he grips the preacher by the throat and holds him up against a pole, Malcolm appears to calm the situation down. Who knew this Malcolm dude would turn out to be so necessary to keeping Lucifer out of trouble?
Dan and Chloe finally have it out, and Dan tells her he’ll fix things. As they’re talking Chloe sees a cufflink with a monogrammed M on the ground. After it’s checked out, there’s no DNA or fingerprints anywhere to be found on it. And to make matters worse, the video of Lucifer attacking the preacher is all over the news. That’s when Chloe notices the preacher is wearing just one cufflink and the M is actually a W for Williams. Two and two add up to Williams as the one who’s been killing the Satanists.
Meanwhile Malcolm tries to party with Lucifer but Lucifer’s in no mood. Malcolm tells him he has his back and knows he didn’t kill anyone. Malcolm admits he’s been seeing things in his head since he went to Hell and no one but Lucifer would understand. Malcolm wants a high five from his new best buddy, but Lucifer notices there’s red paint – just like from the crime scene – on his fingers. Malcolm’s been dying to tell Lucifer he did it because he’s now insane and thinks Lucifer would be impressed with the killing of the frauds. He even set it up to pin on the street preacher. It’s all for Lucifer but Lucifer says, “I’m not evil – I punish evil!” Malcolm reminds him he’s got the get out of Hell free token, but Lucifer’s now ready to play. He’s bringing Hell to Malcolm and then he’ll turn him over to Chloe. Malcolm pulls a gun but Lucifer disarms him. Just then Amenadiel barges in, yelling, “Why don’t you pick on someone your own size?!”
Amenadiel knows Maze was there to kill him on Lucifer’s orders. They argue over who caused all this chaos and then they set to work beating the crap out of each other, all while throwing their father’s name around. Amenadiel actually liked Maze and is more upset about that betrayal than anything else. During all the punching and yelling, Lucifer accuses him of using Chloe to get to him, but Amenadiel honestly has no idea what he’s talking about. Then Maze appears and tells them they both used her. She leaves two demon blades and tells them to kill each other. They don’t.
Chloe and Dan search for Lucifer, with Chloe finding him drinking at the bar. She tells him about the video that made the news and he adds that to the list of horrible things that happened today. He admits he wanted people to suffer and only wanted to be his own man on Earth. He only trusted Chloe and she can actually hurt him. As he’s talking, Chloe walks to the end of the bar and spots the dead preacher on the ground with a bullet hole in his forehead. She tells Lucifer to put his hands up as a bunch of officers arrive as her backup. Lucifer is under arrest.
